Tag Archives: attitude

Plain Stupid Sexism

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It is incredible that in today’s society sexist abuse is still tolerated in some quarters. There has been a lot of discussion about the issue of consent following the Ched Evans case, where a footballer walked in on his friend having sex with a teenager who was so drunk that she had fallen over. He had a turn (filmed by his brother) and then walked out of the fire exit, leaving the woman unconscious due to the amount she of alcohol she had consumed. He then served just two and a half years in prison for rape, rather than the five recommended by sentencing guidelines. Even five years does not seem enough for this crime that causes considerable psychological trauma for the women involved.

I was surprised that a prominent celebrity (a lady on a popular talk show) then blamed the victim for being drunk. There seems to be an attitude, particularly amongst the older generation, that if a woman has too much to drink or wears short skirts then she’s somehow “asking for it”. But what a woman wears has no relation to how slutty she is. Which brings me on to the point that men who have multiple partners are deemed “playboy bachelors” whereas women are called “sluts” and worse.

It is sad that some men, sorry, boys, think it is acceptable to treat women in a degrading, disrespectful and downright disgusting manner. I think we need more education in schools about sexism as like the evils of racism and ageism, which I have ranted about previously, it is plain wrong and incredibly ignorant. These people see the world through such a distorted filter. 36% of women who say they have experienced this type of prejudice The figure is probably higher as many brush it off, given that they are often not taken seriously and accused of “making a fuss about nothing”. article-2706734-2004332500000578-978_306x440

Last month posters suggesting that alcohol means women are responsible for being raped by predatory men were withdrawn by the government after a public outcry which resulted in a petition gaining over 100,000 signatures. Sadly examples such as these show just how endemic sexism is.

I’ve had enough, as have a multitude of women judging by the international slutwalk protests.

Even Serena and Venus Williams were subjected to sexist comments regarding their physical appearance, with the president of the Russian Tennis Federation, Shamil Tarpischev, calling them “brothers”, voicing the outdated stereotype that muscles are for men. Serena Williiams complained, supported by Maria Sharapova. Tarpischev was fined $25,000 and suspended for a year. This outcome gave a clear message that sexism in sport will not be tolerated.

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Filed under Life of Lydia

Staring poverty in the face

Today I was informed by the Jobcentre that due to my appointment missed three weeks ago, I would no longer receive benefits, leaving me with £85 a month to live on.

I had attended that place of misery and contempt the day before to see my adviser. She put me on a two day “Finding and Getting a Job” training course, which I found useful. I attended it unaware that I was no longer receiving any support from the Jobcentre.

I had provided all evidence of my Saturday job, only for my employer to be asked to provide more information.

lifelineA friend said his benefits had been stopped for two weeks, after telling them in advance that he would not be able to attend an appointment. He never received money owed. I have heard of people being sent to interviews when they do not meet the basic job description.

They had all my personal details, why did it take 27 days for them to contact me? Why couldn’t they have asked why I missed the appointment, or at least given me warning that my lifeline was about to be cut?

Luckily although I am nearly out of money to live on, I have received support from family and friends. I have food parcels, tins and the freezer stock. I walk wherever I can to save on public transport. I am making do with a mobile on which I can hardly hear someone’s voice, rather than buying a new one. “Make do and mend” and “waste not want not” are my new job war mottos.

What is annoying is that I did everything that was asked of me. When I was aware I had forgotten for the first time I rang them up and went in on the day. I provided full evidence of my Saturday work and full evidence of my job hunt, I attended all meetings apart from two which I forgot, as I attended the Jobcentre so regularly it was difficult to keep up. I will need a diary now just to put their appointments in.

Despite having a first in Careers Development I even went to the optional (so I was told when I attended) Group Information Session, where I was reminded about how I look for work, along with repeated information about sanctions this, sanctions that.

Where is the compassion? Where is the accountability? Where is the respect for those who are suffering? As a big faceless organisation I do not know who to address my complaint to. I don’t want to bite the hand that literally feeds me, but if I had more financial commitments I would have been tearing my hair out for the 27 days it took them to write to me.

An adviser smirked when I said that I could now buy a printer as I had food. It was to print out job search documents without paying 10p per sheet at the library every time.

In between saving up for one, I was referred to their free printing service. It involved a computer with a program different from Word, so every time I copied and pasted from Word it wouldn’t format and I spent about an hour playing about with it until my c.v could actually be printed on two pages. The reason given was “Word is expensive”. Once finally sorted, I had to ask permission from an employee to take it off the printer. You don’t get much more patronising than that.

There was no one to assist and while I was struggling, I heard two employees chatting. One imitated a man’s broken English. This father had just come in to get a bus pass so that he could take his children to school. I found the lack of understanding and respect disgusting. Clearly he had never experienced the daily financial hardship of being unemployed. The job seeker was desperate and needed his help, yet he and his colleague thought it appropriate to joke about his language ability, something which was probably holding him back.

My adviser was really helpful and thankfully had people skills. I won’t be referred to her this time I expect. I am going to the Jobcentre tomorrow to get myself off the streets, so to speak. Although thankfully I have accommodation provided for. I would now be in debt as a result of the delay, had I not saved.

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Filed under Jobhunting

Interviews are like Exams – prepare to succeed!

Employment blog – useful advice
http://80000hours.org/blog/109-should-we-stop-interviewing-people *Clean-shaven!

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Revise and you are more likely to get a good result! Preparation makes perfect.

If you want a positive outcome you have got to know what you’re talking about and go in with all the documents you need.You need to revise and get everything you need in advance to save rushing and panicking on the day. Then you need to make sure you get there on time, but not more than 15 minutes early or they may think your time-management skills are off.

Read on for advice which I hope enables me to pass my interview tomorrow. I have another one next week – look at the rest of my posts for more advice which has helped me with my jobhunting mission.

Left or right? I have a striped and plain shirt, which should I choose? it’s an office job.

Check out http://www.jobiety.com/9-tips-for-dressing-for-interview.html for more interview dressing advice

– Looks

Are your work shirt and trousers ironed? are your work shoes clean and shiny?are your tattoos covered? is your hair neat/tied back? is your dress or skirt knee length or longer? are your earrings subtle? is your make up/jewelry subtle? I avoid wearing jewelry. A nice watch should suffice, although mine no longer tells the time…

Proof

– Papers

Have you got all the relevant certificates? especially for essential qualifications.

Have you got your passport and driving licence? have you got two proofs of address (bank statement/bill/bank card and cheque book)? National Insurance proof – P45 or P60 or card?

Have you got references? Check that former employers are prepared to give you one in advance. I need 3 years worth – that’s all the contact details of pretty much everyone I’ve ever worked for…Check the list and make sure you have all the documents and photocopies of them, so you look really organised and efficient.

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– Essential skills

Have you practiced them? I need good spreadsheet knowledge, so I’m reminding myself. No good saying I Excel at them if I can’t prove it!

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She's thinking about how her cv skills match the job description!

She’s thinking about how her cv skills match the job description!

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– Have you got down potential answers to potential questions?

This is important for the competency-based questions. Check what qualities they want from you. E.g attention to detail, and think about how your previous work highlights those skills. Prepare your answers and analyse them. Are they the best examples?

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– Travel time

Once you have everything you need make sure you know how long it will take to get there in total – including walking to the bus stop/train station and from there to the interview. If you’re driving, check out where you will park and leave time for it. Check you have enough money for transport costs.

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– Preparation time

Give yourself double the time you usually take to get ready in order to make sure you have everything and remind yourself of the skills you are going to highlight and how.

 – Put yourself in the interviewer’s shoes

1. What would you ask to find the right person for your company?  2. Plan your answers. 3. What would they want to hear? How does this compare with what you have planned to say?

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Finally don’t be beaten by nerves! Think about why you’re the best for the job and convey your positive attitude. This will convince the interviewer too, if they can see that you believe in your skills.

I intend to go in there tomorrow fully prepared and therefore confident that I am the one and they would be losing out by not picking me.

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Filed under Jobhunting